It's over.

The Rox lost in the first round of the playoffs... won the first game of the series but even then with very little power. Proceeded to drop the next three in order. Ouch. Well played Pittsfield, you were the stronger team for sure. While the first two were played in Brockton, the series wrapped up in Pittsfield and I had quite a few adventures out that way.

For one thing, I was facing three consecutive days off. WOW. Unheard of. Friday through Sunday. Three hours of driving and jamming, and then I crossed into Pittsfield territory, where Yankees fans roam free without the threat of Boston leaning over them. The team was an hour behind schedule, so I reached Wahconah Park before anyone else did. I had a 20 minute wait, but they eventually showed up and I hung out with Grant outside of the concrete box of a locker room. Boys.. so much fun. I hope the playful moments stay with me. They'd peek out of the high vent windows at me and tell me how much clothing they were or were not wearing. Eventually Grant and I headed onto the field where guys were getting some pregame work in. Wahconah is a very cool park.. you get an authentic, old-time baseball feel there. The stands are wooden and I tripped or scuffed my feet many times when walking through them, just because they're imperfect and uneven. Much smaller than Campanelli, only one level of seating.. no video board! 

(no idea what that mascot is.. it's not the Colonials' mascot)

Overall, very charming. I liked a few things that they had going on there, one of which was their picnic/beer garden area, which looks like a party space down beyond first base but is open to everyone. They sell chicken dinners- barbeque chicken breasts, salad, bread I think... a picnic meal. They also sold wings, I believe. 

We stood and chatted on the field with players and owners as they would come and go. Made a coffee run for Brac and Nooch, and then it was as good as game time really. A few front office people showed up, along with some other Brockton regulars. Freddy pitched 4 or 5 strong innings, but in the end we lost our lead and dropped the game to Pittsfield. In the process, as things started going wrong, I stalked away from the group out by the picnic area and slunk onto the first row bench as far down the first base line as I could get to watch with dark eyes. A guy my age came over and sat a little ways down the bench, and over the course of the next 3.5 innings proceeded to slide closer and closer to me, I kid you not, until he was pretty much right next to me and within range to strike up a conversation. Hey, definitely a cute guy, but I know myself enough to say that anyone who is meeting me or getting to know me at a baseball game wont necessarily have the easiest time doing it, nor will they have the best side of me. Especially when my team is losing. I tried really hard to be a good sport for Joe. He wasnt too put off, because he asked for my number and we planned tentatively to meet up if I went out with any players that night. It never happened; to my surprise, none of the guys I know well enough went out, and I wasnt going to meet up with a stranger in a strange town. I watched tv with our broadcaster until well after 2 and slept on the floor that night, and throughout our portion of the hotel (all doors led to the outside though.. kind of like a motel) morale was sunk.

The next day held too much nothing. I was awake hours earlier than anyone else, but I didnt want to move as I knew that the people around me needed the rest they were currently enjoying. So as daylight hours ticked on, I fidgeted on the hard floor. Finally, we all got up and everyone went their own ways to get food/coffee. The bus wasnt leaving until 2:30pm...... the sun was beautifully bright and the temperature was blissful. We got bumped out of our rooms, a few of us, and while our room was switched to a comparable one, Scott's was upgraded to what looked like a honeymoon suite:

Yep, jacuzzi right in the main room. Nice.

I found Dom standing outside his room and he beckoned me over to show me about 10 loaves of fresh-baked specialty bread that he had been given earlier that morning. He'd gone out on a walk over towards a health food store that he knows called Guido's, and had seen the bread shop beyond it and ended up making friends there with the people who were running it. We shared some bread and some tuscan bean salad that he had bought at Guido's and had a little impromptu Bible/book study. Dom is awesome, the conversation was insightful and challenging per usual. We read from Isaiah, and after our time I crashed on Scott's bed for the afternoon once the team bus had left and read more of Isaiah. "Stop bringing useless offerings" is the passage that stuck out at me at the time... if it means something to you, maybe we're on the same page right now. Too bad I didnt meet a single other person beyond Dom who could relate to me on the faith wavelength... then again, it was great that there was even one person who could.

I stopped by Guido's on the way to the park (to pick up some of that bean salad for dinner, mmm) and ended up making a friend myself. The guy who was serving me started chatting me up- i was having a fantastic hair day- and it turned out that he worked a second job on some nights at a bar just down the street from the stadium. I told him we might stop in if we had reason to celebrate, and he gave me his card/number. I ended up leaving a ticket for him at will call, and he came to the game once he was done with his day job. John was an interesting guy- he talked about planes and flying like I talk about baseball. His dream is to become a pilot and he was telling me that he was a few months of courses away from being able to start a career. Pretty sweet. Well- we lost. We lost the game. The decision was reached, however, that we wouldnt be heading back to Brockton but that we would stay the night and that everyone would party. I drove Grant to the liquor store, then back to the park, and I decided I would take it easy and visit John at his bar. I was there for a couple hours, and for the record I consumed one beer/drink that night- a pumpkinhead with cinnamon sprinkled on top. Turned out that the bar was the Colonials' spot, so I had them in my view the whole night, which didnt exactly make me feel any better about the loss. The end of the season had consequences for me too, so I was feeling pretty low initially. After too much Colonials glee, I decided I should be with my own team and eventually found them at a bar across the street from the hotel called Halpin's. Things were pretty loose when I arrived, and it got weird for me. There were some cheerleaders who had come out for the game, but the ratio of guys to girls was still pretty dangerous and I was not about to even risk becoming a statistic. No compromising situations. So I left and had nothing to do with the "celebrations" that ensued back at the hotel.

And that was it. Up not-really-so-early to meet up with Dom, DK, Grant, and others in the breakfast room. Soon, everyone was on the bus, and I was heading east in my outback.

I was feeling unsettled about the end of the season on a few different levels. The next couple days saved everything, and I'll surely go into them very soon. For now, it's time for sleep... we've got our 2nd Annual Brew Fest tomorrow afternoon so it's gonna be a busy one!

Top 5 days of the summer (to be expounded upon soon):

Birthday Red Sox

Applepicking

Rained out Game

Family reunion

Bill Lee Game

Great moments:

Eating lunch in a seat on the concourse, my first day

Getting to run the scoreboard

Laser tag

Wiffle ball

Clinics

Batting practice on the field and in the cage

Pancakes

Race to deliver pocket schedules

Fireman carry

Going to Worcester

2nd time being invited to Owen's

Dancing on the concourse at the end of the night

T-shirt toss

Playing with Reyes

Intern softball

Armwrestling victory

Kittens

Jean's Church

Peaceful Meadows

All Star game at Falu's

Chat with Mac in the dugout

Hanging with Brendan

Running the bases to Grant, my last day

Man. September already?

I dont know how I got here. Before the season, everyone was telling me how long and wearing the 3 months would be and I was glad at that point that I was testing the waters with a short-season team. Now I'm feeling like I havent had nearly enough, and we're just a handful of games out from the end of the regular season. I'm at the point where my relationships with people here have grown to a great extent- leaves me wishing that I had those 3 next months (as I would with a full-season team) to really enjoy what has been created. Instead, I'm going to be reentering life outside of Brockton within the next couple weeks. I'm excited for this because my friends in Cambridge, Boston, and on the North Shore ground me a lot better. I've seen a bit of what I'm made of because the past couple months have been a collage of late "nights" and early mornings... long drives... closer-to-average alcohol consumption (before this summer I'd have a beer every month or two months... now I'll have one once a week, maybe even twice... pretty wild for me haha)... flirtation... and frankly, even having had a taste of this lifestyle, it's not as exciting as people seem to think it is. Going to a bar is pretty boring 80% of the time. Ping pong helps, and it's all about who you're with (and whether the Sox game happens to be on still), but I would so much rather do anything else. Walk around. Go to the beach. Hit the movies. Bowl. Play laser tag. Listen to a jam session. Play catch on the empty field. Even just hang out in someone's home. I've never liked the bar scene (I dont drink a lot, and I'm not looking for a stranger to go home with... so there's no point in me frequenting a place like that).

For all the craziness, I'm still noted for my energy and enthusiasm. Still havin fun :) Still making things run. There are only a handful of us left to make it all happen, but at the same time things have started to slow down around us. I've gotten to watch more of the games as of late than ever before. I'm out on the field between innings helping with games. I'm still tending to those birthday parties. The remaining few of us are having a pretty good time of it.

Today we will meet Hurricane Earl. Earl has really caused quite a fuss around here. We're waiting around- took some hacks in the cage today, pulled the tarp, gave a massage, and that's mostly it- and maybe, just maybe, they'll postpone the game. Yesterday 5 of us took down two of those professionally installed large party tents in anticipation of the hurricane. (Surprisingly enough, none of the canvas ripped and no one was injured in the process.) It has been raining on and off, and my hair is all a-bounce from the humidity.

Well, now it's official- the Red Sox game has been postponed. Ok Rox, it's time to follow suit. We can get the game in tomorrow. Also, my elbow is achey and I want to take a nap. What good is a rainy day if you cant enjoy it by napping?
.........
ALRIGHT! It has been called. Packin up.

Sitting out on the porch

I have no idea where to start. So much has happened, so much has changed since I wrote last... maybe the point isnt to record every single thing though. For starters, I had a fantastic birthday. I had no plans for the night of the 3rd, it being a Tuesday night and all. We had work that day from about 10-5 (team was on the road), and at 4:30pm the VP comes into our office and gathers us around. "I hate to do this to you guys, but I've got a task, and you're not going to like it. I need 4 volunteers." Everyone shifted from foot to foot for a few seconds, because we were so close to being able to leave for the night, and someone asked how long it would take. "It'll take about 3 hours.. but you'll have to wait awhile for it to start." More hesitation from all of us, but I like the VP a lot and figured that I didnt have anything else going on anyhow. I volunteered, and after another long unhappy pause a few others finally offered their time as well. "Great... you guys are going to the Red Sox game tonight!" WOOHOO!! Talk about 0-60 in remarkable time... all of a sudden my birthday stood a chance at being celebrated after all. The tickets were his friend's season tickets in row 2 of Grandstand 16 (in line with Red Sox on deck circle more or less) and after I picked them up across town, I headed to Fenway. Traffic was terrible and after parking at Roshan's and walking to the ballpark it was the middle of the 1st. Great game!! I made a bee-line for the bullpen and ended up finding a handicap seat in my favorite spot, right over where Mani (bullpen catcher) keeps his glove. Awesome view of the field. I ended up getting myself on NESN somehow ... THREE TIMES. How many games did it take me?! But there it is. And there I was.

after Lowell's hr

a recap of Lowell's hr shown later in the game

just before Papelbon's last pitch. I was shouting something like here we go Cinco Ocho!

[there's a party happening down the street here, and Dont Stop Believing is now being followed by Sweet Caroline.]

So, pretty sweet huh? There was a bench clearing brawl and we won in the end. After the game Mani gave me a ball. Also pretty sweet. We dont really know each other but I think we are on friendly enough terms. I sit right there whenever I'm at a game, which was quiiiiiiite a bit last year. We've talked a few times. Nice enough fellow. All in all the game was a success and then some.

I got to spend some quality time with the McClellan side of my family. First family reunion!! Very fun. I love them all. Great getting to catch up with my cousins and actually getting to know their kids too. A beautiful smiley bunch of kiddos. I wish I had been able to stay longer, but such is life, and that's OK. I'm blessed to have loving family on all sides of me. Got to speak with my Grandma today and that woman blesses me with every card she sends and ever anecdote she tells. I dont know what I'd do without her, I love her so much.

Work is still such a good thing. Still enjoying the people there, still getting things done, still learning. Starting to think about what happens come September. My friend Jeff, who was picked up by the Rox in mid-July, got released yesterday after a pretty strong showcasing of himself over the past few weeks. Unfortunately he wasnt getting playing time everyday, but when he did he generally made the most of it. We were fast friends, pretty much from when we met while working at a baseball camp clinic at the stadium, and I felt the sting of how abruptly things can shift in this business. Everything happened so fast yesterday... he wanted his walkup music changed and texted me to meet him so he could give me a file of the song... and by the time I got to him a handful of minutes later, he had been released. By the time another hour and a half had gone by I had helped him pack all of his belongings into his Jeep, and by the time gates opened at the park he was headed out of state. My head was spinning just a little bit, but the show must go on, and I spent that night- our busiest night of the season to date- monitoring a prize wheel game and wearing a smile that hurt my jaw. No rest for the weary, though, because 5 of us were staying overnight at Campanelli to chaperon Boy Scout Sleep Over night. 600 people. "UP!" was shown on the video board, and I got a very restless few hours of sleep on the floor of a suite. Sort of a traumatic day, not a lot of time for emotion or processing. Something that has helped me deal with the relationships I've been a part of this summer is the realization that they are potentially extremely fleeting. It's counter-intuitive to a personality like mine to think this way, and it doesnt mean that I dont still strive to treat everyone I come into contact with with respect, but it helps me to keep from excessive people-pleasing. I probably wont see Jeff again, even if he does come back to Brockton to play next year, because there's a great chance that I wont be with the Rox. I will take a baseball gig but have no idea which gig - or where - that will be. It's similar with the people I work with- I always want everyone to like me, but in the end, my lifestyle is a lot different. And that's ok, even if people think I'm lame or no fun because of it. (Though I feel like we all accept each other pretty well, for the most part. )

Anyhow, as it always is, I felt a lot less angsty when I woke up this morning. For one thing, I awoke (albeit at 5:50am) to a text from Ally telling me that Layla Mae was born that evening (she's in NZ, evening for her)!!! Also Ally's birthday. Big day!! That's child number two for her. So the AM started off with some joy. After getting all the scouts out of the park, we dispersed and I headed to Cambridge to get a little bit of sleep. Rest was short-lived, as I had things to do and places to be... Mehdi's wedding was this afternoon at the Vineyard! Lovely ceremony, and I got to spend it with lovely Jayne. Unfortunately the reception was moved from 5pm to 6:30pm, which I only discovered when I got to the wedding ceremony, and as I had committed to work later that evening... well, at least I got to be there to see him get married, even if I couldn't party with them afterwards. The game went so quickly... after a couple of key conversations with Linc and Maxine (Reyes' great great aunt... will get to that in a bit) it was pretty much over. After a little bit of implosion on our starter's part, we won it 6-4 (vs Pittsfield).

Jumping back in time, I'll mention another person who has been a fun part of my summer. His name is Reyes and he's 11- came to visit his great great aunt Maxine for a month all the way from Colorado. At first, it was basic recognition, seeing him every day at the game. Then, we interacted during a between-innings competition, and from that point on he was my little buddy. What a kindhearted kid. He would sneak me little pieces of fried dough (despite many many protests on how illegal that kind of thing is for me... no eating on the job!), he came to one of the baseball camps that I helped with (i love those camps. working with the Rox's base coach Dan is a joy, he is one of the great encouragers that I've encountered this summer; he and Jack in particular feed energy and encouragement into me; hanging with the kids and getting to play baseball all morning with the kids and some Rox players is just as much of a perk), and a couple days ago he sent me a birthday card even though he had already left to go back to CO. Sweet kid. I still have Maxine around who is another amazing soul, and who made sure my birthday got announced during the game on the 2nd (i missed the announcement and the slide on the video board! but totally the thought that counts in this case).

Cant wait for the team's series in Worcester this week. I better get some time off! But even if I dont, I could get to the games after work is through for the day... just a lot of driving on a deadline. Tomorrow I'm going with Dom to see Jean, who runs chapel time for the players, speak at his church. Should be awesome. Jean gets going when he only has 10-15 min.. cant wait to see what he does with a primetime slot :)

I've gotta end this here... need some sleep. Right now, I'm content. I've got everyone I love actively in my life, even if some of you are farther away than others (Old Town... Raymond... Yarmouth... Virginia... New Zealand). I look forward to getting to Brockton every morning, and hate when the team is away because I miss the guys and I miss the fans. My friends from before this summer still love me and are hangin in there till I can get some sort of rhythm to my daily schedule (yeah, I've got some great friends). God is good, and that one never changes. Cant wait to see what's coming in the next two months.

been a while

this is not an update. this is simply to say that I'm still alive, and am hoping to do some writing tonight. we're hosting a boy scouts sleep over night, and I'm one of the lucky supervisors, so I'll have the whole night here at the stadium to catch up on stuff.

thanks for making my birthday special. in retrospect it almost seems like i put effort into making sure it wouldnt be anything out of the ordinary but i couldnt stop it in the end! more to follow.

weekend OFF

I forget that people who work typical jobs get two days off each week. I've had a lot of time off lately, just because the team has been on the road and they've been trying to recharge us all while it's possible. The Rox played their half-way mark game on Saturday, so we've got a good 47 left! They were out of town on Friday but we hosted the Cranberry League All Stars. They got through 5 innings just in time for the sky to open up... we were drenched in seconds. We had to pull the tarp, but it was raining so hard and we were split staffed so we didnt even get it all the way onto the field. So close. Thankfully a few of the players got a clue and came out to help us, albeit a little late. Soon thereafter the game was called but we ended up taking the tarp off the field so that we'd not have to get up early to come in and take it off the next morning. I cant explain to you how heavy a tarp with a lake on it is. You pull and pull on the tarp and your leg muscles burn like they're going to give way by about 3/4ths of the way during the first crossing of the field. I have a lot of fun doing it but there is definitely pain involved. Finally, we got the tarp rolled off the field and got a quick pick-up done with. SOAKED. we were all soaked. I was thankful to have extra clothes for the ride home.

When I awoke the next morning, I had no idea as to what I would be doing for the first of my two days off. Showering was a must so I had time to consider whether I'd go to a Scottish festival with my friend Heather, see Inception, go to a Spinners game, take a walk around Cambridge and Boston, go to the beach...... it was a pretty low key day up until 2:30pm when I was checking facebook only to discover that the softball team I've been a part of for the past couple years- The Juice- was playing in Boston at 3! I immediately got up and walked out the door, headed to the T Station, and go to the Boston Commons in time to watch The Juice bring home a win. My great friend Dave pitched a 3 pitch inning... pretty sweet. As I was sitting on the bench I learned that a bunch of them would be taking advantage of a Suite at Fenway that very night... and they had one extra ticket! 

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. 

saw petey!! (center of the pic, right next to the camera)

Happiest night. So I went to Fenway that night, after making a quick stop at Dave and Rachel's house for pizza with some of The Juice. I got to spend that warm summer evening with Jayne (church/Juice friend extraordinare- saw her when I was in LA), Dave (we used to live in the same house in Somerville, close friend), and Rachel (Dave's wife) among others. Beautiful friends.

 I had missed Fenway so much... almost as much as I had missed the friends I havent really had a lot of time to be around lately. They're incredible people. I miss their consistent presences in my life. They're people I can look up to, people who care about each other and this city and our world. People who care about me even though I've been MIA. Not once did I feel cut down or discouraged this weekend by something that someone said or did. It was entirely refreshing. It's encouraging just knowing that they're out there still. And hey, like I've written, I know some quality people in the Rox organization. I'm really just glad to have had such a memorable day with friends who will still hang out with me once the summer is over with :)

The game was a ton of fun by the way. We won 3-2 in extra innings (11). Always fun to get a little extra baseball in. Lackey vs Lee, who pitched a complete game. Rangers took the other two games in the series, so I'm glad I got to witness the win :) Youk was the man of the hour.

Sunday afternoon came very quickly. Church was a blur, and then I was driving to meet Robin somewhere in York. She treated me to lunch at Stonewall Kitchen (all i can say is wow.. that place... huge and yummy-smelling) and we hit the beach for about 3 hours. Quality time is definitely my love language so even the basic gesture of her coming to hang out with me meant a lot. We talked, prayed, killed little jumping spiders, and I got reaaallly sunburnt:

(even my eyes are red... hopefully thats just tiredness and not an effect from too much sun exposure)

...yeah. i'm using an icepack on my legs right now.

Basically, it was another stellar day. I really made good use of my time off this weekend. Ready to get back at it! We've got three home games starting tomorrow, then they're gone for a week, then it gets a little busier. Right around the time my dad's side of the family is having its reunion. And right around the time Mehdi is getting married. Oh well. When it rains, it pours.

PS, Dusty Brown got called up to the Red Sox last night. Michael Bowden got called up today. Both have already seen some playing time. AWESOME times. Let's see what happens....

You dont say good luck, you say dont give up, It's the fire, inside you

Boston was beautiful today. No clouds overhead, every color the richest and brightest that it could naturally be in the afternoon sunlight. Blue blue sky, brick buildings towering around me, the green of living trees everywhere in between. I even got to say hello to Louie, who happened to be riding his trike at a crawl through the Boston Gardens. Dinner was Boloco............. which was freeeee........... so I went out to get some frozen yogurt, which is my favorite though I never have it anymore.

I've got a few interesting stories this time around. I work hard, but living is pleasantly effortless in some ways these days. I've made surface friends, and now I'm starting to enjoy getting to know these people- and letting them know me.

Seems like I've settled into a good reputation with people at the Rox. I've gotten a number of comments from some "important people" (everyone's important... but in the hierarchy of the organization) about how I'm noticed. I was speaking with someone the other day, and teasingly said something like "I'm just an intern" and he immediately interjected "No you're not. You're a lot more than that and you know it. I see you running around this place working your tail off.." and that's the one that has stuck with me. But it has been an encouraging week in that way. I had a day off on Thursday of last week, and the team was playing in Worcester, so I headed west to catch the game. It was a beautiful, extremely hot, summer evening and I arrived 30 min before "gates opened" but just walked right in as no one stopped me from doing so. I met up with Scott, who is the Rox's broadcaster, then watched the Rox warm up in right field and leaned against a railing on top of the concourse while each player then made his way from club house to dugout over the course of about 30 min. (Apparently no tunnel under the stadium- both teams entered from gates in the outfield). A lot of the guys were surprised to see me, I think... just out of context. I wasnt wearing a navy blue polo- I actually looked like a 24 year old woman (ok, maybe a 21 year old girl).

HOME RUN CLYDE WILLIAMS!!

...while I was speaking with a couple of the guys as they were doing their game time stretches, the manager, Chris Carminucci (who is also an owner) came over, gave me a wave, and asked if i could run up and tell the ticket office to stick a friend of his on the guest list. An intern I remain, even on off days. Anyhow, I jumped up to get it done, and when I came back one of the guys I had been talking with told me that Chris had sung my praises a bit while I was gone. Big smile. Big, big smile, because I hadnt really officially met Chris though it would be impossible for me to not know who he was of course. A few minutes later Chris came back over and told it to me himself- said that Tom has been "singing (my) praises" to him, said that he notices my work around the stadium, etc. I seized the moment and introduced myself. Great exchange!! And that was all before the start of the game... the rest of the night was relaxing and enjoyable. I miss watching baseball more than I realize. Everyone at work the next day had the same reaction- they thought I was crazy, and at the same time werent surprised that I had chosen to spend my off day with the team. Kind of a half-amused, half-mocking smirk playing around most people's lips. But I'm helpless here... I can think of nothing else that I could have done with my evening that would have left me feeling so content- certainly not sitting at home watching movies, and though I love Boston, even just going on one of my walks around the city wouldnt have measured up.

Dom's host dad, Mark Lincoln/Link, was at the game as he generally tends to be, and we sat together and took pictures. He's a pretty cool guy, a bit older than my parents and one of those people who is easy to converse with on and off for 3 hours. Grant was also there of course- he's the team's attendant- and so between Link and Grant I was treated to a hot dog, a water, and a Coors Light. Haha, none of which I initially wanted, for the record.  Wayne Lundgren got mauled... the end score was something like 9-1 and the first 5 runs against were all due to homeruns. Oh well, it happens. He's an Aussie, so at least he's got a killer accent. We've actually got two Aussies- our second baseman, Scott Wearne, is Australian too.

That's pretty much what I have to say about the game. The best parts were the experience of being at a ballgame, knowing the guys, and most of all spending time with Link and Grant.

Sunday was a busy one, as I had 5 birthday parties to manage. Got there at 8:30am to pull the tarp off the field, and then we were told we could do whatever until 11 when we would start officially. I worked on birthday stuff so that when chapel time came around at 3 (when the gates were scheduled to open) I could fellowship with everyone at chapel. Jean was on fire leading chapel, and there were about 7 of us there, so a pretty good showing of guys. The game went by as planned until about the 6th inning when a storm cell popped up on the radar. All interns reported to the tarp at the edge of the field incase we needed to cover the field, and though it rained, the umps didnt call for us. I spent the rest of the game out there and got to enjoy the tie that ran into the 11th inning and that was finally broken by Wearne's walkoff GRAND SLAM. Yeah, it was a pretty great night for baseball in Brockton.

As part of Sunday Family Fun Day we had autographs on the field and let fans run the bases after the game, so it was a good thing that we had started the game at 5pm (actually, one make up inning from a game that had been started weeks earlier was played starting at 4... weird, long day). After extra innings and a long autograph session, we shut it all down. I had been at home for Alex Burnham's wedding the day before, and I was starting to feel some of the happenings of that day by the time things had wound down, so when I finally got out to my car, and everyone else had left the intern parking area, I let some emotion out. Just sat in the hatchback of my car and let it go. Mike Smith (starting pitcher) had the misfortune of running across me on the way to his car (he's the only player who parks in the interns' area). It was one of those stereotypically awkward male-female moments, and when I remember it now I feel pity for him and none for myself. He was on his phone, and once I noticed that he was in my vicinity I turned away and hoped that our acquaintance status would allow for him to politely ignore me, continue his conversation, and leave. For his sake. (I didnt totally hate the idea of having someone to talk to at the moment.) This was about how things went... until he had stored his things in his car, at which point I heard him ask the person on the other end of his conversation if he could call them back. Here we go, I thought. Again, we were at acquaintance status, always cordial but superficial exchanges, so no practice for a situation like this. He asked if I was ok in a slightly frightened, very unspecific, but genuine enough way, and I replied in a similar manner, very vaguely, which I think left us both wanting to say or ask more while neither of us was really able to. He did have one card left to play in the end- he offered for me to join him and some of the others down the road for drinks. It was only 10:30, and I decided I'd stop in for a little while and smile and laugh a bit to end the night on a good note, then head out in time to get some sleep before waking up for a 9am start time.
I  was a little farther out of my comfort zone going out this time around, only sort of knowing any of the guys who were there. I did know Clyde and his wife Amanda, but i was soon quite engrossed in learning about some of the others who I had only mostly said hi to and smiled at under the stadium before and after games. Mike, Wayne, and Keith in particular were all very gracious in engaging a very tired and fast-fading me in conversation throughout the hours I was there. SHOOT. Before I could blink, it was midnight, and I was still in Brockton. I was in disbelief at how quickly time had gone by. Keith, who lives with Falu and Cuadrado and Freddy Flores, was quick to suggest that I stay at their house for the night. He had me at "We live about 5 minutes from the stadium". I'd been offered this very generally a few days earlier, as well, so I felt comfortable with the option. I was thankful that out of anyone, Keith was the one extending the invite, because it was an offer I could safely accept, knowing that Falu would be there. Falu, someone who's character I'm at least getting to know. Anyone else, and I would have politely (and regretfully) declined.

I drove us to the house, and a few of the guys stayed up playing guitar and talking out on the porch, but I went straight for the couch and was out soon thereafter. The last thing I consciously remember was hearing Clyde walking across the kitchen toward me explaining animatedly that, "Amanda and I were talking on the way over and we figured out, there's no reason for you to have to go back to Cambridge EVER. You can stay here, and you can always stay at our house...." I must have chuckled, and then fallen asleep.  Those two seem to have big hearts. What a nice drive to the ballpark the next morning...... I woke up "late" for me and got there right on time.

MIKE SMITH WITH 2 BIG BACK TO BACK K's TO END THE INNING!! OUT OF A JAM.

On Monday I got put in charge of the scoreboard during the game, which I love. I had a flawless night, and I fancy myself pretty good at running the scoreboard :) I ran home that night to get ready to come in for another early start time the next morning. We had a noontime game- Camp Day- and it was something of a blur, as it always is when we have tons of kids in the park. The one thing I remember about the game was that leadoff hitter Scott Wearne touched em all on one play in the first inning (there were some errors involved... but he made it safely to home plate). But we were all pretty excited for what was to come afterwards- the Staff vs Staff softball game! It was a lot of fun, but my arm was not in it to win it. Most of my offense was pretty weak even though I reached base 3 out of 5 times. I held down 1st base to minimize the usage of my arm but after an impulsive throw decided to sit for the last inning and a half. We won it in the end of course. I was discouraged that my shoulder and elbow were that bad. I feel like such a baby icing it... no one can know how acutely it hurts, but then again, it's my fault for playing catch every day. I wish it would just get better. But I feel it even when I'm picking up my backpack. I felt it today doing nothing out of the ordinary. I've read about it and it seems like Rest, Ice, Compression, and Elevation are the recommended self-treatments. Emphasis on the REST for me probably. I'm pretty stupid sometimes. Hey, I found a home plate shaped silly band in the Rox dugout, pretty cool huh? I left mine at my parents' house in Maine last weekend so now I have one again.

Wednesday was a scheduled day off for us interns, but Tom asked on Tues after the staff game who'd be willing to volunteer at a baseball camp that was having its last session on Wednesday morning and I thought it sounded like a good time. (HELLO Maggie... your arm.) I knew the guy running it and I didnt have anything else productive planned for the day so I said I'd do it. After softball and pizza on Tuesday I went to get some ice packs and ended up staying at the house in Brockton again, as I had to be at the park at 8:30am the next morning. Cool evening, tired evening. Cuadrado and Falu's families were there and there was a minimal amount of English being spoken. Cuadrado's wife and son actually live in the house too, and though his son doesnt speak English he would come right up to me and say stuff, and I'd say stuff right back at him, and he'd pose himself with his wiffle ball like he was ready to pitch it to me, and I'd put my hands out as a target and he'd hit them every time. I'm terrible with ages, but this little guy had to be around 2 years old. Great ball control. Typical little boy, had a ball in his hands the entire evening- beach ball, wiffle ball, basket ball. The All-Star game was on, mercifully, so I had a good reason to be down in the living room with everyone being "social" like I wanted to, though it was hard with the English-Spanish thing as well as with my level of exhaustion. Cuadrado's wife fed me, made this great penne with meat sauce dish that was so deliciously home-cooked that it just about made up for the quickly-put-together meals that I've had to throw together for myself over the past month plus. The pasta was eventually followed by a yellow ice pop(pineapple? something tropical but not quite identifiable), and then I called it quits and retreated to Keith's room- he wasnt there for the night and so had offered to let me stay there. I sat on Keith's bed, went through pictures that Megan had taken with my camera that day at the game, and watched as the NL proved to be victorious over the AL for the first time since the 1996 All Star Game. At least Jon Lester was incredible. And I saw Petey there in the dugout. I fell asleep chilly for once this summer, the AC unit overwhelming Brac's small room. It was blissful.

The baseball camp was easy enough- just 12 kids. They played a game on the field, took some hacks in the batting cage, practiced pitching. Dan McNamara, a pitching and base coach for the Rox, was leading everything, so the day was pretty laid back and informative. I believe that he was the first guy in a Rox uniform that I met... I was manning the front desk on my first or second day, it must have been, and he came into the office to fax something. He had a bit of trouble........ eventually introduced himself to me during that meeting as "Stupid" because he couldn't definitively figure out how to work the machine. I think it worked out in the end for him. My favorite part of the day was having the chance to walk through the Rox clubhouse. I've been in the visitors' clubhouse plenty of times, but never in our team's. I dont have a ton of experience with different clubhouses but this one seemed to be a pretty good space.

When all was said and done, Tom told me he didnt want to see me again till 3pm on Friday. I was glad he put it that way, because today proved to be a nice break.. me time.. and as it was I was going to stay to help with a clinic that was happening later that night (Wednesday night). Admittedly, that would have been a lot... a big gap of free time between the morning and evening clinics, and then the evening clinic running from 6-9pm. But I was in helpful mode, so I wanted to help. I would have gone in today, even- I didnt take the internship to get tons of time off, and I just had a few days off within the last week- I took it knowing that it would be a fast and furious action-packed summer. I wanted it to tire me out and push me to persevere out of love for what I was doing. Tom initially offered me time off through Monday because of my willingness to work the clinic on our day off. That's just not tasteful to me.. the schedule over the past month and a half has made it so that my community is at Campanelli Stadium. What would I do with that mini vacation? I've got momentum NOW. No time to risk losing that... it's 3 months that I've got to make an impression and to make a move towards whatever comes next. Month 1... making initial connections. Month 2... solidifying these relationships and networking. Month 3... start actively searching around for employment so that when my internship is over at the start or middle of September I've hopefully got something to move into. But when it came down to it, I remembered that today was the start of our big push on sales efforts. So........... it's probably OK that I have today and part of tomorrow off. :)


Tonight, Mike Smith is on the mound. I'm listening to the broadcast, and I've been blogging this over the course of 2 hours. Probably time to shut it down, get some water, get ready to sleep. Tomorrow I need paper towels and I need to go to the bank. Then work at 3 which is kind of silly. Maybe I'll call Tom about that... that would mean driving a little less than hour each way to be at the stadium for 2 hours. Well.. I hope that this has been one of those interesting insider entries. My minor league ball experiences. This might be the first time in my life where I am really enjoying hanging out with people who I'm very different from. Most of them dont try to change the things that make me "me", and I dont have to worry about losing myself in order to keep pace with them or risk being left out altogether.
I miss McCoy Stadium. And I almost went to the Sox game tonight. "If only it wouldnt go so late"... and writing this now is the first that I'm remembering that I dont have to be in until the afternoon tomorrow. Agh. Oh well.

Back at it tomorrow!

More than fine, more than bent on getting by

I'm sure I'm not the only one who's amused by the fact that this summer is on pace to be one of my absolute best ever. It doesnt match up on paper- the amount of "grunt work" I've put in, the hours, any number of less than ideal details of my circumstance. All I can tell you is that I havent been this energized, focused, driven, motivated, joyful, thankful, and filled with momentum in a long time.

Two nights back I started to attempt to recount everything that has been so good about the past week but I failed miserably. So instead of a chronological listing off of events, I'll try for my own sake to be a bit more general. For one, Leo found me a lefty glove and it's a pretty nice one. Ever since, I have been knocking down doors to get people to play catch with me. From experience over the past two days, I can tell you that playing catch in 99 degree weather (Tuesday)- or even 89 degree weather (yesterday)- feels more like playing soccer in 65 or 70 degrees. Or maybe it's just me. I do run around quite a bit at work, and I mean that literally... working or playing, it seems like half of the time I spend in motion I'm running. In fact, while I was playing catch with Grant (clubhouse attendant) yesterday on the field, the interns were sitting around talking about what an Intern Calendar would look like, and decided that my pose would be mid stride (running). Anyhow. I'm working my arm a good deal these days, and I'm feeling it. I seem to get a little overexcited every time I play, and there's always that one launch where I throw it just a bit too hard or a bit too far for my arm's current looseness.  It throbs from the elbow up to the shoulder, mostly at those two points. Then it gets worse until about 30 minutes after I'm done playing. Falu told me I should go see the trainer.. and I'm thinking it's probably not a bad idea. Figure out some stretches at the very least.

I'm getting to know both Dom and Falu in particular better every day. It's a point of confidence for me to even just know that they're around for the latter half of my day most days, and I am realizing the value of positive interactions, how much energy I get from them, how they impact my mood significantly. These guys, as far as I've experienced them, are always good for some positive energy.. not trying to sound new age-ish. Jack, Michael, and Andy (not players) also tend to leave me feeling encouraged. Now that I'm consciously starting to realize this, I try to gravitate towards these people more and more as they build me up. The Christian connection with Dom and Falu is a key one though.

Yesterday was excellent. On top of playing catch and running around a lot, it was pure fun. We had put together World Cup Night and our promotions were themed around soccer. Highly entertaining night! Before the game we let kids on the field for a free dribble so I got to hang out and get really hot running around with little kids for 45 minutes. We all wore soccer jerseys and encouraged fans to come decked out as well. The between-innings games were a blast, serious entertainment.. we had a sumo show down where two girls got in the sumo suits, dribbled soccer balls around cones, then ran and threw themselves into human sized soft bowling pins while racing each other.. and they did it up, one of them laid the other out and then got owned by her opponent at the end after jumping into the pins. There was a diving contest to see which kid could do the best overdramatic fake fall. We slingshotted a soccer ball at a kid wearing goalie gloves out in left field. Oh it was just a great time. Raffles, launch-a-ball, etc. Vuvuzela sound effects :)  ...and our group's latest thing is putting our hands in and on the count of 3 singing Blame It On The Rain. Yes, I love my life. That's how we ended the night last night once everything was broken down after the game. So all of this was extremely fun, but the thing that made it SPECIAL was that the Sidders took time out to come. Greg Sidder is the new pastor at my parents' church up in Maine- I wrote about visiting them when I was in CA- and they are in the process of a cross country trek from Temecula to Yarmouth (almost there guys!) ...... amazingly, they had enough time to spare last night and kind of on the spot decided to swing by Brockton as they were staying in Dedham that night anyhow. It was great for me to be able to share what I do with the Rox with them. They're fantastic people.

Michael Bowden is doing so well.



Today is my day off. This inevitably means that the Sox are out of town, and so I'm not going to Fenway. I am however going to Worcester to actually watch a full Rox game. I understand very much why no one else I work with would dream of going to a Rox game on their off-day, and I know that someday I too might want nothing to do with the team I'm working with at that point or baseball in general when I am allowed time off from it, but that's just not where I'm at. Grant in all his wisdom very recently insisted that whenever I am fortunate to have a day to myself, I find something to do that is far removed from the Rox. I'm really interested in the team though, especially as I meet more and more of the guys on it. I dont get to watch games, and on the two occasions where I've been afforded that luxury, I've still been working (running the scoreboard) so my attention was on the very basic technicalities of what was going on as opposed to being able to have the full experience of minor league baseball. Falu is comping me ticket and I'm good to go! First pitch is scheduled for 7:05pm. Before that, I need to get myself to a bank, purchase a FAN, and get over this stomach ache. Today will be a great day. Baseball, and I'll get to use my camera. Why not, right? I miss spending time with my camera. Night games are tough but I can get there for warm ups while it's still light out. I got about 4 hours of sleep last night (up too late facebook chatting. not sure what in the world i was thinking.. and then automatically awake and alert at 6:15am) and I'm hoping i can improve on that tonight. Tomorrow I work with Leo and John among others... we're split staffing so half of us are working an event today (the team is away) and half of us are working tomorrow. Tomorrowwwww... is movie night put on by the Town of Brockton. Or is Brockton a city? I dont even know.


I had a less than restful time at home but I got to see a LOT of people who are entirely important to me, from my parents and Grandma to my best friends from both elementary school and high school respectively (and their families, who have had huge impacts on who I am today, no question). Got to see Robin, and spent time with JVP... and even went down to Camp Agawam where Pat is working and had lunch with him and some campers there. It was cool to run into his friend Brendan, who's from Belfast in Northern Ireland and who I had met last fall when Pat and I went over to travel Ireland. Pat is now sporting a Brockton Rox hat. So good to see him... we're both so busy this summer, I dont know the next time we'll have a chance to spend time together. Too bad neither of our schedules will allow us to hit the Glasgow Celtic vs Sporting Portugal at FENWAY this month. That would've been so sweet.

That's my non-recap. Every day is the perfect combination of routine and newness. Nothing is mundane (...ok, sweeping the mulch off of the walkways every morning isnt exactly my FAVORITE part of the day, I'll be honest).

...and, an accident just happened right outside my house. Gonna go check it out. Thanks for your prayers, I'm getting so much out of life.
PETEY COME BACK SOON :(

No time for zzzzzz

Let's make some baseball happen today! Wooohoooo, I'm up and awake and already having a good hair day, even better.

:) :) :)

Tim Chaddick is the best

Give thanks in every circumstance- this is the will of God!




Just got back from helping at Soccer Nights (Vineyard soccer camp, free, for area kids.. week long). I was a coach last year but because of work I couldnt commit this year. Had today off, though, so I sent a friend who works on Soccer Nights logistics a text and told her I'd come by to help set up and start the event. Kids are fascinating :)

Then I received the call... John wanted to let me know that we have to be in at 8:30 tomorrow morning. Earlyyyyy.

About to melt

it's a HOT one.

but at least i'm not wearing a navy blue polo today. yesterday was overwhelmingly hot and humid for our afternoon game. birthdays have been going extremely well, and i've picked up helping Leo with merch duties. i usually have a couple hours every afternoon (most days) where i'm not doing anything in particular, so helping with trying to get a handle on merchandising and the store is a good project for me.
lets go with a quick run down before i get out of here to find some AC. friday found me in the A/V room running the music for the night. i'd never done this before, but i was up there with Paul who runs the video board and Mike who is the announcer. They both helped me get through what turned out to be a more-stressful-than-necessary night. Mike in particular kept me from hurling myself out of the window into the seating bowl below. The soundbytes and songs were all organized pretty well- I had no problem with that- but the cues were hard to keep up with, and I couldnt see almost any of the seating area (where our EMCEE often was) and it was a stretch to be able to see home plate. Also, a lot of the clips' names werent very descriptive, so I was nervous about playing something inappropriate for the play or situation. All things considered, nothing went wrong. There was only one time where I played a sound clip over Mike's announcing (woops)... and since then, I've heard other people do that kind of stuff. Bottom line, we're mostly all new to some of these duties... mistakes are inevitable. That's a hard concept for me to swallow though.
After the game, I went out with the front office staff to the Charlie Horse. As soon as the game started to wind down, I realized that my committing to this post-game event was a poor decision. I was entirely ready for my night to be over, per usual, after we had broken down the concourse for the night, but Karissa had said that I could stay at her place that night and  part of me figured it would be a good thing to put in some intentional effort towards hanging out with these people- all of whom I like very much for knowing them so little. I was tired enough that I changed in the parking lot by the car we were taking, and when we got to the Charlie Horse I zoned out to enjoy my beer (compliments of Karissa) and watch the Sox game. Eventually, I had a few conversations, but soon got... well, dragged isnt the word for it, i wasnt THAT hesitant... off to the dance floor. That was a great time, and the majority of us danced till the band was done for the night. By the time we got to Karissa's house, it was after 2am. I flopped onto her futon and was out like a light. Of course, I was up by 7am that morning... didnt even take advantage of the rare ability to sleep in before work. We were due at the stadium by 10am, so we lazed around a bit and Karissa made cinnamon rolls.

Saturday and Sunday were both 1-birthday days. Pretty light.  I hope you all get to come out to a game this summer and see what we've created. Unfortunately, John and Leo were both scheduled to be out on Sunday for various reasons, which is a hefty blow since John's head of promotions and Leo's merch guy. As I've picked up some of the merch stuff lately, it seemed a natural progression that I would assume responsibility on game day in Leo's absence. It seemed doable, on paper at least... but as Sunday morning rolled on (8am work start time) it became more and more apparent that I was overcommitted for the day. The birthday was largely taken care of, but there were little stressors, such as the fact that I hadnt been successful in connecting with the leader of the party voice to voice. I also hadnt printed a few seat reserve signs out, I hadnt gotten the souvenir gifts that we give out to each party by half an hour before gates opened... just little things that were piled up. And then you throw on top of this the merch duties, which I had never had to take care of and wasnt wholly clear on. I was having a hard enough time printing out the inventory lists for the store and the concourse merch stands as updated ones had been typed out in a program that wasnt compatible with excel and on a computer that wasnt on the network. I hadnt even begun to seriously think about stocking the concourse stands or finding the money bags for each merch station. Even apart from all of this, I had volunteered to run to the store and get a bunch of balloons and party trappings for a season ticket holder's birthday being held in one of the suites (not my department). This intended quick trip ended up taking 45 minutes because Shaws was backed up with balloon and flower orders. When I got back and was working hard on getting one of the networked printers to print, someone came and collected me to go to the pregame meeting where we go over everything happening throughout the day. This meeting bumped right up alongside of the Chapel time, and that was another 30 minutes I wasnt going to have to be getting tasks done but I knew that it would benefit and bless me to devote this time that I suddenly didnt have to God and fellowship with the others.

Chapel (11am... gates at 12) was really pretty good this week. Jean, Dom, Falu, and I were the ones this time around but we talked about Radical Love and I got to let a thing or two off my chest and received some support. The people I work with are my friend group right now- I dont have the physical time to be around my friends here in Boston and Cambridge, so it's been so important that I find a few strong, likeminded people who arent afraid to live their lives in a spirit of radical love. I dont see that practiced on a day to day basis and it's burdening... I enjoy everyone I work with but the harsh comments are wearing. I communicate this, too, but it doesnt make much of a difference. Anyway, Dom talked a little about how he can relate and I felt surprisingly better just hearing from him that he would be around the park if I ever just wanted to chat. He gave me his number, and I think I'll probably track him down towards the end of the week. I dont know him almost at all, but I can tell that he is probably the best person I've come into contact with this summer simply by the way he treats people. He's also the only other person connected to the Rox who I know is really into Jesus- I'm sure some of the other guys are too, but Dom's personality seems to be a bit more outgoing, a bit more forthcoming when it comes to the Bible studies. Enough on that. Oh, he's the starting shortstop for the Rox. Melvin Falu plays the outfield. All in all, chapel was extremely encouraging in the most simple way. But once it was finished with, my immediate responsibilities came back into focus and I was off again, running around and realizing that with only 20 minutes till gates opened, there were far too many things to be accomplished. After having printed the price/inventory lists for the store and the stands, I ran back to the ticket office to snag some tape... and who was outside the door but Leo. AHHHHH, Leo, what was he doing here? But I was so glad in that moment, because I was facing impending failure. Or at least, that's how I felt. He had asked for the day off for his flag football semifinal game, and potential final game as well if they won the first one... and so I assumed that he had lost that first game but knowing a little bit about Leo I was shocked that he decided to come back here instead of taking the rest of the day. I only add these past few sentences to give you an idea of how completely unexpected this appearance was to me. He took over and I breathed for the first time in 3 hours.
Think what you will but I know God took care of my in my circumstance that morning.

The rain came but we didnt end up rolling out the tarp. The game finished, the kids ran the bases, fans got autographs down the third base line on the field, and then we stood at the gates handing out pocket schedules for about 45 minutes while a Christian concert was happening in front of the Rox dugout. I was not a fan.

Finally, eventually, got out of town around 6pm. It was a long, hot, humid day, and I treated myself to a veggie burger at Not Your Average Joe's so that I could watch the end of the Sox game. Jon Lester was awe-inspiring. Complete game on 101 or 102 pitches. Just amazing.

I'm helping at the Vineyard's Soccer Nights soccer clinic tonight. Very psyched! It was so much fun last year.  Kids are the best. Already looking forward to getting back at it tomorrow.